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Wednesday, August 30, 2006

An e-mail from the past

I got a surprise last night. One of my best friends revealed that he had an email that I had sent him a long long time ago. This email had been sent so long ago that I did not even remember what I had written so I asked him to forward it to me and then delete his copy. The reason for the deletion being that this email had been written in the prime of my youth when I was going crazy about my feelings for a certain someone that will remain unnamed. But most of you who know me would know of whom I am talking about as it was the worst kept secret ever.

These feelings (lets call them a 'crush' for want of a better word) started when I was 15 or 16 and continued until I fell in love with my first ever girlfriend who pretty much helped me forget my crush. And all it took for that was about 6, 7 or 8 years. I forget...

It was written on the 19th of October 2000 which is not that long ago but that was probably the most emotional time of my life. I had sent it from a yahoo email that I no longer have and frankly do not remember having at all. Mostly the email recounted how I was chasing after girls one after the other, in Male' and out of it, and how when I got near my 'crush' I would get tongue tied and all those other crrazy emotions that everyone feel at sometime or other in their life.

Once I got the email, I remembered just how strong that crush had been. But with it also came the knowledge that I had really moved on. I am married now and so is my crush but to different people. We still remain friends and chat sometimes very infrequently online. As my wife pointed out after reading this email (she thought it was cute... ), I will always have a soft spot for her.

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After much deliberation I decided not to post that email here. I am going to delete it even though my wife wants to print it out and show it to our kids and grandkids... I dont know...

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Dissecting the Demon with the long navel

There is a folk tale from Maldives called 'Foolhu Dhigu Handi'. Literally translated it means 'the demon with the long navel.' I have been trying for some time now to actually write down this story in English but for some reason or other have not been able to do so. The gist of the story is that a woman by the name of Aiminabee goes to the mosque to get water from the well. There she encounters the 'foolhu dhigu handi' who is sitting in the grave yard and pouring sand over himself with a skull. Needless to say Aiminabee runs away screaming and the demon follows her home where he proceeds to ask her whether she had seen him in the graveyard pouring sand over himself with a skull. Obviously he was looking for the answer 'no, I did not,' which is what Aiminabee tells him and he goes away happily.

But he is back again the next day, and the next, every time with the same question; whether Aiminabee had seen him, blah blah blah. Every time Aiminabee answers in the negative and he goes away. As this is playing havoc with poor old Aiminabee's nerves she finally decides to tell her husband and he makes up a plan to get rid of the demon once and for all. He tells her to make a bowl of lonumirus which is a paste made with lots of chilli and other spices while he goes and sharpens his knife. He also proceeds to check over their hut and fixes up every tiny nook and cranny he could find save one. They then proceed to wait for the demon to make its appearance.

Sure enough the demon arrives and asks his inevitable question. This time however Aiminabee shouts out 'Yes! Yes! I did see you in the grave yard pouring sand over your head with a skull!'

The demon is taken aback for a moment. He had not expected this answer but then he finally realises what had been said and gets very, very angry. So angry in fact that he screams and bangs on the door of the hut. But Aiminabee's husband had barricaded the door so he goes around the hut searching and poking, trying to find a way inside. When he comes upon the only hole that had not been sealed, he stops and stuffs his elongated navel in through the hole.

This was the moment that Aiminabee's husband had been waiting for. He takes hold of the long navel and pulls. He keeps pulling till the end of the navel has been reached and the demon has his belly to the side of the hut. He then cuts off the navel and Aiminabee splats lonumirus over the gaping wound. The demon does not know what hit him but he is in obvious agony. He jumps up and down and runs off screaming the words that all Maldivian children remember from this story; Addho ma foolho Foolhako Foolho. Which translated goes something like this; Ow! Ow! My navel! Qw navel! Ow Navel! Or something.

I first heard this story long time ago when I was in diapers and was enchanted by it. Nowadays after finishing a degree in literature I am feeling very grown up and this means no more just listening to a story and enjoying it for what it is but I have to go dissecting around and figure out why, what and when.

The first question is why oh why is this demon pouring sand over himself??? Is this what they do? Is this how they keep themselves clean? Maybe water has a negative effect on them much like acid has on us. And where did he get that skull? Sure it is a graveyard but surely all the skeletons are buried. And this graveyard is in the grounds of a mosque so the most obvious question would be how the heck did that demon get so near a mosque to dig up the skull of someone buried there and then go on to terrorise the womenfolk who are getting water from the well???

The next question is to do with the demon's navel. This whole story revolves around the fact that the demon has a long navel. How did he get such a long navel? We don't know. Why wasn't it cut off and tied up? We don't know. Why oh why did he in fact try to stuff his navel through that hole in the side of Aiminabee's hut? That we do know; because he is an idiot. I don’t really know what he was trying to accomplish with that. As far as the story goes, this navel does not have any special abilities. It wasn't able to grab things or even move without the demon moving it. Most of the pictures I have seen from old Maldivian storybooks contain pictures with the demon walking around with its navel coiled up like a rope around one of his hands. So if it was trying to get the navel to actually go inside the hut and grab Aiminabee, he was seriously out of luck.

And aren't demons supposed to be stronger than humans??? That is in fact the basis of every folk tale I have ever heard. But once the demon pokes his navel into the hole and Aiminabee's husband pulls it all the way through the demon does not resist and it comes in pretty easily. Why?

There is the other side to this story of course. The one rated 'Mature' and 'Adults only'. I am sure you know how that story goes. *wink* *wink*

Another version of Foolhu Dhigu Handi (after reading this version most of my dissection pretty much goes out the window... hehehe. AND I finally know the name of Aiminabee's husband :P )

Friday, August 25, 2006

Looking for Lunch

I had a hell of a time trying to get some lunch yesterday. After handing in some forms to the place that I am going to start work in next week, I decided that I should reward myself by having some Indian food for lunch. Previously I had been to three places in Melbourne that served good Indian food. There was one on Collins Street, one at Monash Clayton and one at Southgate. So without really deciding on the place I thought I would catch the train from Moonee Station.

As I stepped into the station the train pulled out so I had to wait a further fifteen minutes for the next one. Now once I got on this train I decided that I would not go to Clayton; it was too far away. So that left either Collins Street or Southgate. The train stopped first nearer to Southgate so that was settled then.

With that decision made I prepared to step out on Southern Cross Station... which was a mistake because the station I need was the next one - Flinders Street. I only realised this after getting out of the train at Southern Cross and going outside. So I had to turn around, go back to the platform and catch another train to Flinders Street Station.

Now this should have been enough drama for a Thursday. But once I got out at Flinders Street, I headed the wrong way so I was in fact heading away from Southgate instead of towards Southgate. To top it off it was also raining and after going a bit of ways I realised in fact that I was heading the wrong way so, once again I turned tail and headed back the way I had come, back to the station and this time, I saw headed the right way and managed to get into Southgate and the Indian place without further delay.

Once I had ordered rice with beef vindaloo and lamb korma and settled down to eat, I took my time. It wasn't everyday that I went through so much just to get some good food into my stomach. All in all I would say it was worth it. That was the best lunch I had had in a long time.

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Window Live Writer

Windows Live Writer was a bust. I don't think I will be using that to post anything to my blog in the future. The layout was pretty cool and I could post very easily. My problem is that I cannot post any pictures using WLW. When I try to post pictures it says that the website does not allow posting of pictures so I am guessing that posting pictures from WLW is available only to Windows Live Spaces. Oh well it doesnt matter too much to me. I can still use Blogger directly and I end up with good posts (whenever I decide to write them that is ... )

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

This is a test


I am trying out Windows Live Writer.  lets see how well this will work. Looks very cool on the writer page but who knows how the actual post will end up. knock on wood!

Monday, August 21, 2006

Passing of a year...

Somebody pointed out to me yesterday that it has been a year since I started this blog. I did not notice it but yes, it has been a year and some days. I started this blog on the 17th of August 2005. Then I did not really understand what a blog is supposed to contain and I did not really update my blog regularly either. All in all in those 371 days of the blog's life I have posted only 52 entries. Thats like one post every 7 days. If I really do some checking I probably will find that there have been gaps of more than a month in between posts.

It has been only recently that I have tried to post more regularly. Actually since I started doing this creative writing course I was given an assignment to identify 100 things that I want to do in my life and on top of that list of course was "To compile a list of 100 things I want to accomplish in my life." Second on that list was "To write at least one entry on my blog everyday." That does not include the pictures or videos or jokes that I have posted in the past year. Only those genuine entries that have come from the creative labyrinth that is my mind. This entry is the first one. Many more is to come, so watch this space...

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Pre - Birthday Wishes

My sister called me the night before last. She wanted to wish me a happy birthday which was a bit confusing because my birthday is not for another month. It seems that her kid (my niece) who was born one day before my birthday was celebrating turning 11 months that night and my mother had got a bit confused and thought it was my birthday as well. So when she told my sister she had called me without realising the actual date. Once I told them it was not my birthday and they got all embarrassed. At least I got to talk to my sister, mother, father and brother. I also managed to hear some noises made by my niece who did not want to wish me a happy birthday. She is probably the only one there who had managed to keep her wits around them. Call me in a month guys… and send me a birthday present this time…

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Lesson in Anatomy


First year students at Med School were receiving their first anatomy Class with a real dead human body. They all gathered around the surgery table, with the body covered with a white sheet.

The professor started the class by telling them, "In medicine, it Is necessary to have two important qualities as a doctor. The first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the human body."

For an example, the professor pulled back the sheet, stuck a finger in the butt of the corpse, withdrew it, and stuck it in his mouth.

"Go ahead and do the same thing I did," he told his students.

The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but Eventually took turns sticking a finger in the butt of the dead body and sucking on it.

When everyone finished, the professor looked at them and said, "The second important quality is observation. I stuck in my middle finger, and sucked on my index finger. Now pay attention."

Thursday, August 10, 2006

On Having a Bad Day

Supposed to be a true story!

THE NEXT TIME YOU THINK YOU ARE HAVING A BAD DAY: Fire authorities in California found a corpse in a burned out section of forest while assessing the damage done by a forest fire.
The deceased male was dressed in a full wet suit, complete with SCUBA tanks on his back, flippers, and face mask.

A post-mortem revealed that the person died not from burns, but from massive internal injuries.

Dental records provided a positive identification. Investigators then set about to determine how a fully clad diver ended up in the middle of a forest fire.

It was revealed that, on the day of the fire, the person went for a diving trip off the coast some 20 miles away from the forest. The firefighters, seeking to control the fire as quickly as possible, called in a fleet of helicopters with very large dip buckets. Water was dipped from the ocean then flown to the forest fire and emptied. You guessed it.

One minute our diver was making like Flipper in the Pacific, the next he was doing the breast stroke in a fire dip bucket 300 feet in the air. Apparently he extinguished exactly 5'-10" of the fire. Some days it just doesn't pay to get out of bed!

This article was taken from the California Examiner, March 20, 1998

Monday, August 07, 2006

Creative Writing

I started doing a short course in Creative Writing last week. My assignment for the week was to practice creative writing on "a word."

I got a bit confused by this. Did the trainer want me to choose a word, just any word, from the dictionary and write something about that particular word? Or did she want me to write on exactly "a word?" Literally? It was probably the former. But then I got to thinking… It would be really creative of me if I started writing about "a word." The problem was I did not know how to go about it. And I am pretty damn lazy to think too much about it. Besides I am feeling quite sick today and not up to writing anything. I just want to curl up in bed and sleep, sleep, sleep till I am all better.

I cannot however do that. This course is for three hours once every Monday and I have to go to the class today. So I have taken some painkillers and am hoping against hope that I will feel up to making that one and a half hour journey that would take me to the campus, get through the three hours of listening, creating, writing, talking about what we have written and why and then make the one and a half hour trip back home.

So here goes nothing:

A word that I like is like

I like to use the word like

It's akin to a whole hour of therapy,

Of foraging into my psyche.

A word that I love is love

I love to use the word love

Makes me feel as warm as a hand

That's wrapped up in a glove

A word that I need is need

I need to use the word need

It is an OCD but …

I don't know how to finish that. But my time is up and I have to get going if I am going to be able to make it to the course. Maybe the trainer can help me unlock the creative flow that is at the moment banging his head on the locked door of his cell.

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Miss France

The Zidane headbutting of Mattarazi has given rise to several similar incidents. There was one incident with models, another where a jockey headbutted his horse and now this. Have to laugh though...